YOU'RE Beautiful!

As my day continued yesterday, I could not shake my chaos feeling of being scatter brained and not focused for anything. Although I had many great moments; I just was sort of discombobulated. Throughout the day, on three separate occasions God pursued me with the song "Beautiful" by Mercy Me. My internal dialogue resembled much like "yeah yeah, that's sweet God. Thanks" I even turned off the you tube video that I clicked on from a friends blog, walked into the other room, turned on my radio and sat on the couch. about 30 seconds later, it came on the radio. I mean, C'MON.

In the evening, I met with a woman that is going to be my mentor. I have been praying for a woman that has more years of life and wisdom to mentor me (the young married woman, that seems to not know just exactly how all of this life stuff is to be done). We met for the first time and in giving her my run down of my history and the rhyme to the reason I am who I am today, just opened up and peeled back just a bit more of that onion that we seem to forever be working through. Yet, I was still feeling a bit apathetic and distant.

I then went to a prayer night with some people from my church. we had an amazing prayers session of confession. When we entered for the evening, we entered in silence and connected with God. I have to admit, I usually LOVE times like this. And I just couldn't get there. I remember praying for a revelation, and just sort of saying it, not really knowing what I was asking for. ...FFWD to about an hour in to our prayer time and we open a book of songs that the leader has listed that he can play on the guitar for us. I open it and start looking and, of course the first one that catches my eye is "beautiful" by Mercy Me. And I think, I need to hear that. I'm not going to ask, that's just silly. I've already heard it three times today. And oh, say 30 seconds later, the leader says "I'm feeling song #39" REALLY?!. At this point I cry a little, but nothing earth shattering. We have some awesome moments of prayer and worship.

We went into a time of reflection and silence, and were to speak up with we felt led with whatever that looked like. I was hung up on the words to this song. Reading them over and over.

The days will come when you don't have the strength

When all you hear is you're not worth anything

Wondering if you ever could be loved

And if they truly saw your heart they'd see too much

You're beautiful ,You're beautiful

You are made so much more than all of this

You're beautiful ,You're beautiful

You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His

You're beautiful

I'm praying that you have the heart to find

Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonight

For all the lies you've held inside so long

And they are nothing in the shadow of the cross

You're beautiful ,You're beautiful

You are made so much more than all of this

You're beautiful ,You're beautiful

You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His

You're beautiful

Struggling with the lies of "who are you to be beautiful and worth dying for?" to "who are you to reject Gods love?" "it's not about you" "get over yourself" "this time is not for you"

And THEN it happened. I just started confessing all of this confusion and the flood gates opened. In that time, I was forced to receive His love, His safety, Unconditional Love & Peace from my Heavenly Father.

WOW. Just verbally breaking those lies that I have believed since a child. I left feeling graceful. precious. valued & loved by the most important one, God.

Knowing that the process continues; but each time we go a little deeper; that unconditional love plants itself a little deeper.

Friends, it doesn't end there. I woke up later than usual, got in my car to go swim with a friend this morning, and guess what song comes on the radio for my 7 minute drive... Flippin' "Beautiful" by Mercy Me.

Yes, God loves me and pursues my heart!

I always agreed with the words, but I couldn't BELIEVE them for me. I'm still working on it. ;) So, I leave you with the importance of confessing the lies that you have come into agreement with about yourself. Once brought into light, they loose power over you!

Be Blessed today,

~B

Beautiful - Listen to the song